a girl and her body guard: a note to husbands

It's all over pop culture news--the latest high profile scandal--the latest dish on who slept with who and they were still married to who?! news story.
The headlines are everywhere:

Heidi Klum Dumps Husband Seal for Bodyguard 

or

Klum Fornicates with Hired Help

Ah yes, just another day in Hollywood history. 

Beautiful woman married to successful man falls in love with her bodyguard. 

Unbelievable? I think not. Shocking? Hardly. 

Now I am no marriage therapist but does it really surprise anyone to hear that a woman is attracted to the point of adultery to a man that protects her? 

Now hold your ponies for a minute before you start thinking that I am ok with this or think that this is 'normal' or fine. I have seen adultery up close and way too stinking personanlly to brush it off as no big deal or 'something natural'. But one thing I will say, women want to be need to be protected and if that protection is not coming from her husband, you can bet your pretty penny that there is a man out there willing to do the job. 

This is not to say that women are these delicate little creatures that are not able to survive without a strong man to protect them and care for them. This is not to say that Heidi was innocent in the matter or that adultery is justified when there is a deficit in the marriage. I speak as a woman that is slowly growing to understand this complex and mind blowing relationship called marriage.

Through the last blissful decade of my life, I have had the great joy of living life hand in hand with my very best friend. It has been my agony at moments and my sheer delight in many others to be the one to meet his needs and stand by him as an unwavering support. Together we are a united front. Without that unity, we are destined to fail. This is not to say that we never disagree or fail to see things eye to eye--it is saying that we have learned that in spite of our disagreements we are still on the same team and if we don't fight for our marriage, no one will. 

For a woman, it is critical to know that he will defend her and protect her. This does not mean that she can treat others poorly while he stands idly by agreeing with her actions. Just the opposite actually. A man that protects is a man that loves her enough to protect her from herself...often her greatest enemy. 

A man that protects her is a man that will fight for her when she is too weak, too weary or too broken to find the will to fight for herself. A man that protects her is a man that sees her beauty and sees her affections as something to be fought for...guarded...cherished, even if it is costly to him to do so. A man that protects her is a man that prays the armor of God over her as each day begins knowing that the power of God is greater than anything on earth. A man that protects is a man that steps in and dares to speak truth when she is over committing or afraid of the opinions of others. A man that protects is a man that sees the need to take her out of her role as mom and housewife to give her the space to simply be a friend and companion. 

From the time she was twirling in tutu's and dreaming of brave knights on white horses, she has imagined romance and has seen it in the eyes of her protector. 

A girl and her body guard. 

Romance and protection. 

Some things never change.